There Really Is No Place Like Home

I realize it's been forever. I apologize.

I've basically been busy, with auditions and various other things that I explain in this blogpost. I basically took a trip to Oz. And while it was fun, I've come to realize that there's no place like home.

In any case, this is going to be my last posting on "Amuse Me, Internet." It was fun while it lasted. I am, however, still keeping a blog. It's just at a different url for various reasons. And I'm not taking this one down. I just won't be posting anything new here.

From now on, you can find me here: http://comfortingabsurdities.blogspot.com

To all of you who so bravely continue your internet quests, I have one thing to say.

So long, and thanks for all the fish!

- Chelsea

Fuck NC.

In honour of anti-homophobia day, here are the vlogbrothers and all of Nerdfightaria fighting against World-Suck.
- Hank Fighting Against World Suck.
- John Fighting Against World-Suck.

Here are a whole bunch of youtubers against hate.

Fuck you, North Carolina.

My Philosophy Teacher

This picture essentially sums up my philosophy class...

Courtesy of  iwastesomuchtime.com

Except that when my philosophy teacher did this, he jumped up onto a table, crouched down, and said "This would be the cool part about being a cat," and I'm pretty sure he meowed and pawed at his head.

He also throws erasers across the room at random intervals to demonstrate the relationship between private vs. public space and time.

David Tennant, Being Awesome

Just thought I'd give you all a little David Tennant, being awesome.

David Tennant, Being Awesome

(Courtesy of iwastesomuchtime.com)

Babbling

I feel the need to, first of all, applaud the cast for the projected Les Miserables movie adaptation set to come out in December 2012.

Courtesy of IMDB.

I can't get over it. It's beautiful.

... although I will admit, I'm not 100% sure as to what Sacha Baron Cohen is doing there...

In other news, seeing as I've been gone forever, I got sick over the weekend.

Me, passed out.

I should also mention that I've been super busy lately what with all of my shit-ton of rehearsals (YAY being a music student!) and I apologize for kind of neglecting Le blog.

I would also like to share something that one of my very good friends linked to me via facebook that had me laughing probably the hardest that I've laughed all day:

A Lack of Crackers via humorswitch

I apologize for this post being all over the place. It's late and I feel shitty.

I think I'm going to go to bed. I just felt the need to let you all know I hadn't died.

Eating Frosting

What happens at the end of a long day:

... Cause I'm a classy b*tch.

Lost Time..?

It's been a long time... I apologize.

First of all, I have a life (i.e. papers to write, who are we kidding) and have therefore not been spending nearly as much time as usual surfing the internet, which has par consequence not allowed me to find anything particularly amusing to forward to you all.

Secondly, I'm still not used to the new blogger. I'm seriously not appreciating it.

To make up for some lost time, here is a look at my life right now:

Yes, I subscribe to the DavidsTea newsletter.

Also, that kiwi one looks delicious. ALL THE TEA!!

My first experience with canker-sores

The singers' cure for anything from canker-sores to cold-sores to various other forms of oral herpes (or, let's face it, any other form of herpes) :

... with honey. Subtlety is for losers.

"Put some Windex on it!"

I should probably mention that I'm performing tomorrow... >.<

Venezuela

Gaby and I had the following conversation on facebook:

So I drew her a picture of Venezuela, in the style of SatW, not appreciating that.

I see Venezuela as a sexy spanish woman in a short red dress.

Venezuela has her arms crossed.

Singers Are Clearly Intelligent

I just finished practicing. I FINALLY FIGURED OUT why I was feeling so much tension when I sang my high notes.

Are you ready for this?

My jaw was tight.

*facepalm*

I'm fixing it now.

I am very easily amused

www.iwastesomuchtime.com

Groceries

Grocery shopping for the modern classical singer:

Also, yes that is a Buffy shirt. Forbidden Planet in NYC.

I'm cool like that.

#MakeKonyFamous

(Today's post is not particularly amusing. I do this pretty infrequently, please forgive me.)

I remember this time, in my grade ten history class, that my teacher showed us a video called "Invisible Children." It was about this awful man, Joseph Kony, abducting children from their homes and turning them into ruthless child soldiers, and a group of young people trying to make a difference in the world. I remember being moved. I remember crying.

I remember wanting to make a difference.

Of course, that night, I went home, and completely forgot about the issue.

Let's not let that happen again.

Three words:

Make

Kony

FAMOUS

Watch the video. It is half an hour long, but it might change your life, and the issue is important... Plus the film is beautifully done, so the way I see it, if you don't have the time to watch it, you're missing out.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4MnpzG5Sqc

http://vimeo.com/37119711

Sign the pledge. It takes two seconds of your time, it DOES have an impact, and it's free to do.

http://s3.amazonaws.com/kony2012/kony-4.html

Buy the action kit:

http://invisiblechildrenstore.myshopify.com/products/kony-kit

Lastly, here are the posters for COVER THE NIGHT, in case you don't have the money or the means to donate or purchase them:

http://themainmtl.com/post/18893471345/kony-2012-montreal-posters-available-to-print

Otherwise, have a great night everybody. I'll post something funny tomorrow.

EDIT: This was linked to me on facebook. After reading it, I still support what Invisible Children is trying to do, but it did get me thinking, and I always think that if you're going to support or oppose something, it's always good to see and hear both sides of the story.

http://visiblechildren.tumblr.com/

What Happens When I Don't Sleep Properly Several Days In A Row

One of my close friends just went through dental surgery today.

She's miserable and in pain, so I've decided to dedicate today's blog post to her - mainly because it's about me being stupid, and that always cheers her up.

Also, I feel as though the punchline to this story is going to be extremely anticlimactic, considering the amount of set-up that is needed to tell it, and since her stories are ALWAYS LIKE THIS, I feel as though I owe her one. I'm warning you, the end is really not as funny as you'd like it to be.

So with that, Daphnee, this one's for you. Feel better.



So one of my best friends had her 18th birthday party on Friday night. It was a scavenger hunt, followed by a TOTALLY WILD party at her house later that night (don't kid yourselves - we cracked open a bottle of sparkling wine, and shared it amidst 11 or 12 people.)

And don't you know it.

So anyway, about halfway through the week, I started brainstorming for ideas as to what on earth I could buy this girl (cause, let's face it, I'm a little last-minute.) Finally, I came up with the brilliantly original idea of getting her an Omer DeSerres gift card - to those of you who don't know what that is, Omer DeSerres is an art supply store in Montreal. I don't know whether there's a chain of them nationally or internationally, and to be honest I really don't feel like looking it up, so if you're curious, feel free to Google it.

In any case, I decided to be brilliantly original and buy my best friend a gift card. Of course, I told my other best friend (yeah, I have a lot of best friends. I'm clearly very popular) that this is what I was getting Gaby (the first best friend. You must be having trouble keeping track), and Reveena (the second best friend) being who she is, decided to buy it with me.

Of course, neither of us had any time during the week to actually go downtown and buy said gift card, so we decided to do it the day of the party.

Now, what you have to first understand about me is that I am a very not-punctual person. I am the type of person who will get out of bed five minutes before I am supposed to leave the house. I think, if there was an opposite of punctual, that's what I would be - anti-punctual. I think that's really just a fancy way of saying "late," but hey, it makes me feel a little better about myself.

The second thing you have to understand is that Reveena is kind of a lazy person. Not extremely lazy, not lazy to the extent that I am lazy, but just lazy enough to make this story plausible.

And the third thing you need to know is that between the two nights before this incident, I had slept a total of 10 hours - that being 5 hours a night - and I DON'T DO 5 hours a night, particularly not two nights in a row. It simply doesn't happen. I become extremely tired, and when I am tired, I become extraordinarily single-minded, and lose ALL ability to multitask.

To whit, it was at about 5:15 on that Friday afternoon that I started to get ready to leave. The plan was for me to get on the 5:28 bus, which Reveena was supposed to be taking, go downtown together, buy the giftcard, grab something to eat, and meet everyone back at the metro by 6:30.

I promise you right now, you do not know where this story is going.

(Unless of course I've already told you the story, and considering that the majority of my readers are close friends deferred from my facebook account, let's face it, that's highly plausible. However, let us proceed as though you had never heard this story before.)

I had asked Reveena to call me when she got on the bus at her stop, which is about 7 minutes away from mine.

The phone rang at 5:21. I answered with a hopeful "Hey, I'm gonna do my best to make the bus, but if that doesn't happen, I promise I'll be on the next one."

Reveena knows me pretty well, so at about 5:30, my doorbell rang.

The next bus was coming at 5:42, and if we missed it we were going to have to walk to the metro. Normally I would have no problem with said walk, but that night, factoring in the icy wind and my heavy sleepover-material-laden bag, I was in no mood.

I raced around my room, trying to frantically throw together an appropriate outfit, fix my hair, brush my teeth, apply makeup, and make sure I had everything I needed for the next day (pjs, undies, clothes, ballet leotard & slippers - I was going straight to my class, deodorant...) to Reveena's chattering and munching - she was snacking on an apple.

It was at about 5:41 that I was grabbing my toothbrush, the final item I so desperately needed, and hastily shoving it into my bag. Reveena went back into my room to shut the lamp on my bedside table. This is a lamp I leave on pretty constantly, because it's kind of out of the way and a bit of a pain in the ass to shut. As she was fumbling for the light switch, she happened to drop the core from the apple she had been eating directly onto my floor. Of course, being a thoughtful human being, she cried out "Whoops! I dropped my apple core."

Instead of being sensible, I, with my eye on making that bus, cried out "Just leave it!", shut the lamp, and charged out of my room and down the stairs, to the sound of her protests.

Of course, it was only when we got to the bus stop that I fully realized what had just happened.

And that is how an apple core decorated with someone else's spit took up residence on the wood floor in my room for about 16-18 hours.

We made the bus though. ;)

That Test Is My Bitch

GO CHELSEA!

You WILL make your music history test tomorrow morning at 8:30 am YOUR BITCH!! Because you JUST SPENT AN HOUR STUDYING, and hell knows THAT'S ENOUGH TIME!!

Your history test will BOW DOWN TO YOUR AWESOMENESS!!

You will OWNNN RENAISSANCE MUSIC!!

That's right!!

You are AWESOME!!

AAARRRGHHH!!!



This is my pep talk. And now it's bedtime.

Real Life Disney

I feel as though my childhood just legitimately slapped me in the face.

Somehow, it was awesome.

(P.S. none of the following is original content.)

Find the rest on http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/1RsYYB/www.behance.net/gallery/Envisioning-Disney-Characters-in-Real-Life/2072296/

Thank you to my awesome bff Reveena for bringing this to my attention.

French the Llama

I thought I should just come out and say it: I am a nerdfighter.

To those of you who don't know what a nerdfighter is/does, and/or is not familiar with nerdfightaria, please watch this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FyQi79aYfxU (and or really any other video by John or Hank, who are known as THE VLOGBROTHERS!)

Most simply put, a nerdfighter is a person who instead of being made out of bones and skin and organs is made entirely out of awesome.

This is me. I am a nerdfighter.

Not actually mine, I am borrowing it from a friend, but I AM in the process of reading it and it IS awesome.

Nerdfighters fight against world suck.

So Heisenburg and Schrodinger are speeding. A cop has them pull over. He walks to the car and says "Do you know how fast you were going?" And Heisenburg says "No, but I can tell you exactly where I was."
The officer thinks this peculiar response is grounds for a search, and he finds a dead cat in the trunk! And he says "Do you guys know that there's a dead cat in your trunk?" And Schrodinger says "Well I do now!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zrnd63DAH8o&feature=related

DFTBA!!

Free Time

I've discovered the reason I am so unproductive.

... I should not be allowed free time.

Batman Justice

Earlier today, I saw this on iwastesomuchtime.

I have seen it about a hundred times since, and I can't help but laugh every single time.

Incontheivable!

I think you should all know by now that I love stupid puns, and I love anything that has to do with The Princess Bride. (Or really anything else awesome. But seeing as this is most definitely the best movie ever made...)

I will not be sick.

10 essential MUST-HAVES for the sick opera singer:

1) A kettle.

2) Electricity.

3) Water.

4) Honey.

5) Lemon.

6) An enormous cup.

7) A big-ass sweater.

8) Scarves. Lots of them.

9) The ability to complain.

10) Someone to complain to. (If parents and or boyfriend/girlfriend are unavailable, the internet can sometimes be used as a substitute.)

TIP: The complaining can be largely intensified if you have a lesson and/or recital in the next few days.

Carmen on Facebook...

I feel as though this speaks for itself.

Panda Porn?

Reasons I love watching The Daily Show (and of course the Colbert Report) : Tonight, I learnt a hell of a lot about panda porn, I learnt that networks REALLY ONLY pay attention to language, and DEFINITELY NOT content, I was re-educated in the application process of condoms, I learnt that Stephen Colbert has not gotten laid in a VERY long time, and I witnessed Ricky Gervais air-raping a small raccoon.

Happy Valentine's Day, everybody!

People will think we're... up to something.

Happy Valentines/Singles-Awareness day, everybody! :)


In addition to the original post, here are a few more valentines cards to share with that special someone... (DISCLAIMER: I'm aware that most of them are hugely politically incorrect. If you get offended from here on out, it's your problem, not mine - I've warned you):

A Set Of Dictator Valentines:

http://benkling.tumblr.com/

And last, for all you Whofans out there:

Link

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY, everybody!

Boys Suck

One of my best friends went on a date that didn't go so well.

I decided to make her this picture, because when she told me about it, she asked me to make her feel better.

Hon, I'm also sending you a virtual pint of ice cream, two spoons, and an action-movie marathon.

I am there with you in spirit.